Wikivoyage:Joke articles/Interdimensional travel/Wonderland

Alice's Wonderland is in another dimension behind a looking glass.

Understand
A familiarity with playing cards and chess is recommended before entering Wonderland or its mirror universe.

Read

 * Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll is a fine introductory text.
 * Through the Looking Glass is a valued scientific treatise on the underlying mirror universe theory.

Talk
Please refrain from speaking French to the tiny creatures. "Où est ma chatte?" ("Where is my cat?") will offend the mouse, who will try to escape.

By rabbit hole

 * Just follow a white rabbit with a pocket watch who incessantly complains "I'm late, I'm late, I'm late, I'm late, I'm late."

By looking glass

 * The mirror universe is located on the other side of a looking glass; be cautious or you will fall through into this alternate dimension.

Get around

 * The entire countryside is laid out in squares, like a gigantic chessboard. Queens are able to move any number of vacant squares at once in any direction.

Do

 * Croquet is a most popular sport. Live flamingos are used as mallets and hedgehogs as balls.
 * Perhaps a game of chess? Get Alice to the eighth row and she too can be the White Queen.

Events

 * An unbirthday is an event typically celebrated on any or all of the 364 (365 on leap years) days in which it is not the person's birthday.
 * A "mad" tea party is held daily at six o'clock; the March Hare, the Hatter, and a very tired Dormouse give Alice many riddles and stories.

Learn

 * Undertake research in an attempt to find an answer to the Mad Hatter's riddle "why is a raven like a writing desk?" as the Hatter admits "I haven't the slightest idea!"

Work

 * Workplace safety is greatly lacking in Wonderland. Mercury is employed in production of felt used in the manufacturing of hats; daily exposure causes trace amounts of the metal to accumulate in the body over time, causing workers to develop dementia. You don't have to be crazy to work here but it helps.

Buy

 * Peruse the mirror universe's fine book stores. Alice recommends a book with looking-glass poetry, "Jabberwocky", whose reversed printing she can read only by holding it up to the mirror.

Eat

 * A cake with "EAT ME" written on it in currants causes Alice to grow to a tremendous size and flood Wonderland with her tears. So much for staying on a calorie-reduced diet.

Drink

 * A bottle on a table labelled "DRINK ME" causes Alice to shrink, until she is too small to reach a key which she has left on the table. She must then embark on a twelve-step programme to get back up.

Sleep
Wonderland is itself a dream sequence, which may be ended at any time by waking up.

Connect

 * The Mad Hatter and the March Hare are both the White King's messengers as he needs two messengers, "one to come, and one to go".

Stay safe

 * Subjects are often punished before they commit a crime, rather than after, and sometimes they do not even commit it at all.
 * The Queen of Hearts is a foul-tempered monarch, a "blind fury" quick to decree death sentences at the slightest offence. Her most famous and often-repeated line is "Off with their heads!"

Go next

 * Joke articles/Interdimensional travel offers multiple universes of possibilities.