Wikivoyage:Bad jokes and other deleted nonsense/South Lopka

South Lopka (South Lopkan: Lop Kan Mmm Sam, Kaantraal: Sud Laapkaanse is a country in Lopka. It lies south of Central Lopka, and east of East Lopka. South Lopka comprises of the southern part of the Lopkan island.

Understand
At the southern part of the Lopkan Island, It was in alliance with East Lopka until after the Lopkan War when it split under the LAT Treaty (1985).

Climate
South Lopka has a humid and sticky climate (tropical). The Summer is sticky, foggy and misty. The Winter is cooler but still foggy and misty.

Being one of the wettest of the Lopkan countrys, unexpectent weather can be forecast.

Cities

 * Mmm Lop Sap


 * Kram Mmm Sap
 * Sap Mmm Sap
 * Kram Lap Sap
 * Dam Fram Lop
 * Pol Dam Mmm

Get in
Regular flights from Mascalama, Kampung and Van Der Hoeksaapen. Sometimes flights from other cities such as Acamacalacapeno and Xiujiang.

A visa is needed for visitors from North Lopka and Dviopskivoires.

There are border points with East Lopka only at Kushmakan and Malakashan, and some border points from Draafstein at Gaastraaikruger and Vaalpaalstroom.

By plane
Mmm Lop Sap Airport (Kram Mal Fam), formerly known as Mmm Lop Sap Kram Dal Mmm San Airport', is the main international airport of Mmm Lop Sap.

Major international airlines that serve Mmm Lop Sap directly include:
 * East Lopkan Airlines. from Masacalama, East Lopka
 * South Lopkan Airlines from all over Lopka.
 * Western Laapkaanse Draafstein from Van Der Hoeksaapen.

By land
You can cross at Kushmakan in East Lopka. You will need to pay 7800 SLK to pass through. Thats the only major one.

There is an South Lopkan Consulate in both Xinjiang (NL) and Kampung (CL) where you should be able to purchase visas.

By bus

 * Cross-border buses

There is a direct bus service daily between Mascalama and Mmm Lop Sap. Operated by Gasakanan Bus and Mmm Gan Salp Bus. Journey takes 34 hours.

By boat
There no boats. Sometimes a East Lopkan vessel might take you onboard.

By bus
Mmm Gan Han Bus Company is the only bus company in South Lopka. Roads are poor in the rural areas and crashes are common so you better off taking the nationwide tram (Mmm Kan Tram).

By car
You can hire a car at the airport for 55,704 SLK.

By plane
There is no domestic plane service. If you own a plane, please don't fly it around unless you have a Trans-Laapkaanse Flight Card (TLFC) which can be purchased by post in the L.A.T.

Talk
Most people speak South Lopkan. This language is very easy for English speakers to learn. Despite this, you are more likely to hear people speak East Lopkan or Central Lopkan as opposed to English.

See
Statue of Mmm Fan Gram- A famous South Lopkan artist. Mmm Mmm Dan Hill- A great hill to view Mmm Lop Sap.

Buy
The South Lopkan Kam is the legal tender currency in South Lopka and all transactions are in SLK. ATM's are everywhere apart from rural places..

Markets

Fran Mmm Lop Market is the biggest market in Lopka and contains many antiques. It opens every Wednesday and 5 hours (1pm-5pm)

Eat
South Lopkans love seafood. South Lopkan seafood is the best in Lopka.

Tipping 

South Lopka has a hefty 2,400 SLK tipping charge (35%!). Be prepared to splash out for crappy service.

Drink
Try Gan Mmm Fan. It is a weak beer mixed with liquid tuna. It tastes werid but the locals love it.

Sleep
Try the Mmm Jan Kan chain of hotels. The beds are comfortable. They are everywhere.

Stay safe
Avoid the Mmm Lop Sap seafront at night. Attacks are known to have happened. Avoid telling people you are from North Lopka because they do not like North Lopkans.